Tales from Toril- The Underdark Escapees: Book One, Chapter Twenty-One

Blingdenstone, the City of Speaking Stones Part 2:

The Hauntings

Dramatis Personae:

Thecker Powdercraft, the Deep Gnome Wererat Gunslinger and Inquisitor of Bahamut
Lady Claire Thundersword, the Human Wererat Swordcaptain of the Purple Dragon Knights
Hans, Claire's Basalt Wolf Figurine
Sajin Silvertongue, the Deep Gnome Wererat Assassin who can't sneak
Mezzem, the Kobold Wererat Priestess of Bahamut
Natali, the Tiger Therinthrope Beastmaster
Yklwa, Tali's Deinonychus animal companion

Topsy and Turvy, the Deep Gnome Wererat Rogue Twins

Comrades we have lost:

Ront, the Orc Fighter- turned into hamburger by Pwent

Buppido, the Derro- smashed by Orvald

Eldeth Feldrun, the Shield Dwarf- killed during escape

Hera Adaar, the Abyssal Tiefling Wild Sorceress- swept away

Luna Trelawny, the Human Divination Wizard- skull caved in by rock thrown by Fidget, then finished off by black pudding

Sarith Zekarit, the Drow Scout- drowned

Phillip Johnson, the Human Cleric- in a seemingly irreversible coma, left in Hemeth's care

Jim Jar, the Deep Gnome- eaten by grell

Prince Derendil, the Quaggoth- killed by sea troll

Shuushar, the "Awakened" Kuo-toa- turned into shuushi by sea troll

Hemeth, the Duergar Arms Dealer- parted with group in Gracklstugh
Thimblepwent Battlehammer, the Dwarven Battlerager Barbarian- turned into dog food
Orvald Abershaw, the Mousefolk Barbarian- became a squeaky toy last seen in Bahamutsville under Zin-carla
Zenit 'Dracon, the Drow Fighter- abandoned the party because Orvald died last seen in Bahamutsville
Lythana Belmyr, the Half-Drow Blood Hunter of Eilistraee- sacrificed to Demogorgon
Codsworth, the polite Flumph- shredded by crossbow
Zarrus, the Tiefling Favored Soul Sorcerer of Mephisto- vanished during gnoll fight
Ol' Sparky, the Deep Dragon- last seen thrown into a portal to the Abyss by a glabrezu
Aura, the Air Genasi Storm Sorceress- accidental self-vaporization (bitch blew herself up)
Kyri, the Minotaur Scout- vaporized by a jackass

Fidget Stonegear, the Deep Gnome Inventor- big badda boom 

Miarielle, the Lythari Priestess of Corellon- bigger badda boom
Kazul, the Copper Dragonborn Shadow Monk of Bahamut- skull caved in by another rock from Fidget
Glabbagool, the Gelatinous Cube- stayed with the kobolds
Kara Reginleif, the Half-Valkyrie Wererat Champion from the Zhentarim who compulsively keeps everything she finds- vorpaled to pieces by demon Easter bunnies

Stool, the Myconid Child- unwilling dance partner to drunk stone giant

Rumpadump, the Myconid Child- frozen by demon Easter bunny

Quests in Blingdenstone:
Discover where the ooze infestation is coming from
Parley with, or exterminate, the Goldwhiskers
Tell Yanthal Coaxrock the location of Entemoch's Boon
Destroy Vazuk
Recover Udhask's remains
Harvest samples of elementals corrupted by Ogremoch's Bane and return them to Nomi
Try to banish Ogremoch's Bane

Cleanse the Steadfast Stone, a temple that has been corrupted by Ogremoch's Bane

Kill medusa and bring Sark her head

Friendly fire overall: 132

NOTE: Things will be mostly from Claire's perspective, anything with italics is from a third party, since the knight can't be everywhere at once.

***** Eleasias 29, 1489 DR (The Year of the Warrior Princess)

       A short time after we passed through the gate to head to the Goldwhiskers part of Blingdenstone, we came across a ten-by-ten foot pressure plate that was taking up the majority of the tunnel; it was not going to be easy to get around without setting the damned thing off. Sajin decided to try to disarm the trap, but it was a fucking pit trap, not something you can really disarm; to make the stupid trap even worse, the pressure plate was really a concealment cloth. As Sajin realized this more ground fell away from us- everyone except Sajin was able to jump back in time.

       As Sajin began to fall, Thecker tossed her grapple at him, trying to reel the jackass in, and they both fell into the stupid pit... Thecker noticed something almost moon-shaped embedded in the wall of the pit, but before she could investigate, a group of wererats attacked them. Wererats appeared out of nowhere and began firing poisoned crossbow bolts at us- I saw Sajin and Tali stiffen up as the bolts struck, they were paralyzed. I felt my muscles tense briefly in response to the poison, but I was able to shrug off the effects.

       Thecker shot at two of the wererats, killing them instantly, while Mezzem paralyzed one of them. I stepped up and terrified them with my Rod- that power is pretty cool. The paralyzed one managed to pull itself free of Mezzem's magical grasp, and began to move away, and I saw Tali twitch- she was breaking out of the poison, good. Thecker attempted to get them to back down, since we just wanted to talk to them, not kill them, but they wouldn't listen- none of us were in the right form for it. Topsy shoved two of them into the pit, spearing them on their own spikes- I think they died instantly. Turvy managed to knock one out, and as I surveyed the area, I realized the unconscious guy was the only one we hadn't killed. This wasn't going well.

       Sajin, still in the pit, decided to collect some of their poison, and the asshole poisoned himself in the process- he dropped unconscious... I used the ladder function of my Rod and gave us a quasi-bridge to get over the stupid pit. Mezzem climbed the ladder upside down in hopes that she could reach jackass and revive him. I try not to wish my comrades ill, but Sajin makes that hard. He's been horrid to me since the moment we met because I'm human- so I thought it served him right if he died from his own stupidity. I feel like the Underdark is making me a harder person, and I'm not sure if I like it. Kazul would know what to do, I miss her so much. Anyways, Mezzem was just barely able to reach and revive jackass.

       Topsy tied up our prisoner, in one of the most elaborate fashions I've ever seen, and everything is elaborate in Cormyr. While she worked on that, Sajin decided it would be a good idea to try to collect the poison that had just almost killed him again. Fucking brilliant idea. This time he didn't fall and begin bleeding, though he did poison himself again. He crawled at a snail's pace to the rope we had for him to get himself up- Mezzem was still using my ladder so she could fix him again if need be.

       Thecker began talking to the prisoner in gnomish- I swear sometimes she doesn't realize she's even doing it, and other times it's totally intentional. She announced to the rest of us that he was having trouble breathing, so we'd have to let him out of his bonds before he could speak- that sounded like as good of an idea as Sajin collecting poison. Sajin attempted to untie him, but Topsy's knot was too elaborate, and he got his fingers tangled in it instead- was hilarious watching him try to get free; Topsy untied the prisoner when she was done laughing at Sajin.

       The wererat told us something would devour us all- though I have no idea what. Before we could demand he elaborate, he squirmed free of us and dodged Thecker's attempt to tackle him; only to be caught by Tali's snake bow, and tackled by Sajin and Mezzem. Topsy through the really big bag of holding I got from Kara over his head, and he, Sajin, and Mezzem were all sucked into it. Mezzem was able to wriggle free, but as she did, the bag sucked Topsy in. Turvy managed to grab his sister, and I grabbed hold of the wererat, while Tali grabbed Sajin. We knocked the ass out and shoved him back in my bag.

       As we continued on, we began having trouble sniffing out the path, there was a strong, acrid scent in the air that masked everything else. Since we couldn't sniff out which way to go, we chose to go north- and that stench increased. Tali did something that was supposed to allow her to sense wererats, but she was only picking up Mezzem and I; Topsy tried telling her they were only rats from the rings, but she knew they were full of shit. Svirfneblin have an innate ability to make themselves undetectable by any divination magic or scrying sensors, which the therinthrope didn't know. 

       After a while Sajin began insisting he needed to rest, apparently poisoning himself and not contributing to actual battle is taxing on him. He found us a cavern that appeared safe, and the smell was more tolerable. We split up to explore the place to find somewhere securable to rest.

       Tali came across a xorn, who was asking her for money, but she didn't speak Terran and didn't know what a xorn was; it ended up getting frustrated and hitting her. Thecker and I came up behind Tali as this elemental thing was hitting her. Thecker attempted to talk to it, but she doesn't speak Terran either- we really need to learn that damned language apparently.

       Sajin found a nicer looking house that appeared unmolested, and found what he believed to be a banshee inside. He used his boots of speed and ran to the rest of the party to ask for help. Sajin skidded to a stop beside us and announced there was a banshee in a nearby house. Thecker and I left to deal with it, and told him to handle to elemental thingy. When we entered the house, Thecker was immediately slammed into the wall. Sajin fed the xorn 12,000 gold worth of gems... more than a xorn tends to eat in a lifetime, and scampered after Claire and Thecker. 

       Sajin came bursting into the house and was thrown into the ceiling, which was fucking hilarious. As I laughed at him, I suddenly felt a pressure on my mind. Claire was possessed by the spirit in the house- it wasn't a banshee like Sajin had thought. Sajin was acting weird, so Thecker thought he was possessed instead of Claire, and she shot him. Claire swung her Rod at Thecker, and the gunslinger responded by hitting the Purple Dragon with her shield. The twins appeared out of nowhere and stabbed Claire in the back, while Sajin knocked her out. 

       It claimed Tali's body next and went to take out the healer, the one who could hurt it the most. Sajin stepped on a trap and dropped as it went off- he had again almost killed himself today- though Mezzem revived him right away. Tali pounced at Thecker, hoping to trap the svirfneblin beneath her claws, but Thecker turned at the last second and Tali missed her mark. Sajin, seeing this, shot at Tali. The spirit announced that Thecker was the one who was possessed, not Tali, but Mezzem knew it was lying. The twins had spotted a safe in the room, and as Thecker went for it, Tali jumped in front of her screaming "mine!"  It did not want them to open that, which meant they had to. Topsy and Turvy knocked Tali unconscious, making the spirit leave her. 

       In an effort to keep the party out of its safe, the spirit dropped a stone slab on top of Thecker and Sajin. Thecker dodged out of its path, while Sajin crumpled beneath it- the safe was sealed. She spotted a cupboard across the room, something that one wouldn't go for if the safe was available- that had to be where its bones were. She gathered the bones and began dumping salt on them. The twins managed to get the slab off of the safe, and Mezzem attempted to help them crack the lock- only making it worse... She revived Sajin and Tali instead.

       Stone slabs began flying across the room at Thecker, as the spirit tried to keep her from burning its bones. It missed, but succeeded at scattering the bones, making Thecker's job a little harder. Topsy and Turvy got the safe open, and the entire room began to rumble, random things flying everywhere, trying to hit whatever they could. They grabbed the contents of the safe, and cleared the room as Thecker set it on fire. Mezzem downed a fire breathing potion to make the flames hotter. They collected the unconscious Claire as they cleared the building. 

      I came to back in the tunnel outside of that house, and saw smoke billowing out of it; we decided to get back to town to rest, and to lay low for a couple of days- the Goldwhiskers would likely be looking for us once they found the bodies of their kin. The weird elemental thingy popped up again as we were leaving, and Thecker tossed it a sizable bag of gold, which was apparently all it wanted. The Underdark is strange.

       Once we made it back to town Thecker took the ashes of the spirit's bones to the catacombs below the Ruby in the Rough to la them to rest. A ghost approached her when she got down there, calling himself Burrow Warden Jadger, and asked her for assistance in clearing up the ghost problem the city was having. Jadger asked Thecker to destroy a spirit named Vazuk, and to recover the remains of Udhask in the Rockblight district and return them to lay him to rest.  

       In exchange for every person she laid to rest down there, he would answer one question for her. She put both the spirit and Fidget to rest, and learned from Jadger that the rats were near the old smith location, and that the oozes were in the north eastern area of the city. Thecker agreed to his requests, and returned to tell the party of their new missions and new information.

***** Eleasias 30

       This morning we decided to deal with some of our other missions before we returned to the Goldwhiskers area. The rat we'd stuffed in my bag apparently escaped when we weren't looking- likely while we fought that damned spirit yesterday- and that meant the rest of the clan would be expecting us. We decided to deal with Vazuk first, then head to the Stoneheart Enclave to tell them about that weird circle.

       When we got to Vazuk's house we discovered he wasn't a ghost, he was a poltergeist, so no bones, we just had to beat the shit out of him. He smacked us around a bit before we realized he was different, and Thecker and I managed to take him down while he wailed on Mezzem.

       After that was over with, we went to the Ruby in the Rough to get directions to the Enclave, and to see about getting some healing. Glyphic was in the middle of helping someone else when we entered, and Sajin being the jackass that he is, demanded the lad stop what he was doing and come heal him right away. We slipped him some coin to "help" Sajin, and he dislocated Sajin's shoulder! That was hilarious, so I slipped him a few more coins, just for the entertainment.

       He threw Sajin out of his temple, and by threw I mean I drug the jackass out. While I kept Sajin outside, he gave the others directions to the Stoneheart Enclave. We headed out shortly after that.

***** Eleint 1

       About halfway through our travels we entered a cavern that sounded like the one from Glyphic's directions. It seemed this time we weren't getting ourselves lost. Good. An hour or so later we finally found the Stoneheart Enclave, which was marked by a huge elemental guarding the place. Yanthal wasn't there, so we were directed to speak with Nomi Pathshutter instead, it sounded like she was second in command.

       We found Nomi easily enough, and gave her directions that circle thing in the basilisk chamber. She told us that she had made protecting elementals from Ogremoch's Bane her life's work, and that she needed our help with that. Nomi asked us to bring her samples of elementals who had been corrupted so she could study them further. She believed that it she could get more samples to study, she might be able to find the key to saving elementals; we agreed to help, and shortly after that we turned back toward Blingdenstone.

       During Thecker and Topsy's watch an elemental randomly appeared in camp, petting the party's elemental lizards. The mephit had returned again, and it gave Thecker a stick of dynamite it had made from her gunpowder.

***** Eleint 2

       We made it back to Blingdenstone about halfway through the day, it was nice having the elemental lizards that we could push a little harder. When we got back we decided to go to the Rockblight district to deal with the many missions we had centered in that place.

       As we approached the gate to enter Rockblight we were approached by a man called Gurnik Tapfinger, a priest of Smoothhands, and he asked us to the Steadfast Stone, a temple to his god, that was in that district. He gave us something that would make it hallowed ground, and told us we'd have to defeat three generals in order to cleanse the temple, they were corrupted by Ogremoch's Bane.

       Since we had heard that a guard around Rockblight needed help with something, we asked the guard on duty there about it when we reached the gate. Sark Axebarrel, the guard there, told us that there were reports of a medusa in Rockblight, and asked that we kill her and bring him her head as proof of the deed.

       After we made it through the gates that led to Rockblight we heard the sounds of water and battle coming from up ahead of us on the path. A ghost appeared, scaring the hell out of Turvy and Sajin- it was hilarious, they both turned tail and ran. The ghost yelled at us that "they're coming, everyone must hide,"* then ran further up the path, in the same direction as our cowardly svirfneblin. We followed the ghost to a little house, and inside we found a skeleton sitting on the floor next to a little bed. Mezzem talked to it, and it said the drow were coming, and his heart had given out while guarding his treasure. This was Udhask, who had apparently been stuck living the same moment over and over for a century. His final request was to sleep, and we gathered his remains so he could be laid to rest.

       We moved into the next chamber in this cavern to find "a shallow, swiftly flowing stream bisects this cave. Crystalline formations sprout from the floor on both sides of the stream, and rough-hewn staircases at the back of the cave climb 30 feet to a barren stone ledge with a pair of winged statues perched atop it."* The stairs were flanking a waterfall, and the scene was breathtaking, though still disturbing. We headed for the stairs began climbing, Tali and I still having trouble doing so since these stairs were all made for tiny gnome feet.

       As we neared the top of the stairs the gargoyles came to life and launched themselves at Thecker... right, gargoyles are earth elementals. Thecker and Sajin stabbed it, and Topsy threw her boomerang at it- she barely touched it and it crumbled. An elemental- one that was obviously so, not one faking being a statue- popped up next to us, so Mezzem shot it with her radiant light, outlining it for me, and I came in behind her with my Rod activated as a flame tongue; apparently it didn't like that, it turned its huge fists at me.

       Tali shot the remaining gargoyle and Mezzem finished it off, while I landed the killing blow on the elemental. We were able to collect samples from all three of them, and in the center of the elemental we found an emerald.

Photo from Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast

Photo from Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast

*Author's note: Many of the events, locations and characters that occur in this story are from the Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast. Anything with an asterisk next to it is a quote from the book.

Therinthropes as a playable race

We are looking for artwork to add to this! If you've got something you think would look awesome on this sheet submit it in the comments!

This page was created at The Homebrewery, an amazing resource for people who make their own content.

Tales from Toril- The Underdark Escapees: Book One, Chapter Twenty

Blingdenstone, the City of Speaking Stones Part 1:

The Eyes of the Tiger

Dramatis Personae:

Thecker Powdercraft, the Deep Gnome Wererat Gunslinger and Inquisitor of Bahamut
Lady Claire Thundersword, the Human Wererat Swordcaptain of the Purple Dragon Knights and wielder of Dawnbringer who is the only thing she trusts and has an imaginary personality in addition to the real one
Hans, Claire's Basalt Wolf Figurine
Sajin Silvertongue, the Deep Gnome Wererat Assassin who can't sneak
Mezzem, the Kobold Wererat Priestess of Bahamut
Natali, the Tiger Therinthrope Beastmaster
Yklwa, Tali's Deinonychus animal companion

Topsy and Turvy, the Deep Gnome Wererat Rogue Twins

Comrades we have lost:

Ront, the Orc Fighter- turned into hamburger by Pwent

Buppido, the Derro- smashed by Orvald

Eldeth Feldrun, the Shield Dwarf- killed during escape

Hera Adaar, the Abyssal Tiefling Wild Sorceress- swept away

Luna Trelawny, the Human Divination Wizard- skull caved in by rock thrown by Fidget, then finished off by black pudding

Sarith Zekarit, the Drow Scout- drowned

Phillip Johnson, the Human Cleric- in a seemingly irreversible coma, left in Hemeth's care

Jim Jar, the Deep Gnome- eaten by grell

Prince Derendil, the Quaggoth- killed by sea troll

Shuushar, the "Awakened" Kuo-toa- turned into shuushi by sea troll

Hemeth, the Duergar Arms Dealer- parted with group in Gracklstugh
Thimblepwent Battlehammer, the Dwarven Battlerager Barbarian- turned into dog food
Orvald Abershaw, the Mousefolk Barbarian- became a squeaky toy last seen in Bahamutsville under Zin-carla
Zenit 'Dracon, the Drow Fighter- abandoned the party because Orvald died last seen in Bahamutsville
Lythana Belmyr, the Half-Drow Blood Hunter of Eilistraee- sacrificed to Demogorgon
Codsworth, the polite Flumph- shredded by crossbow
Zarrus, the Tiefling Favored Soul Sorcerer of Mephisto- vanished during gnoll fight
Ol' Sparky, the Deep Dragon- last seen thrown into a portal to the Abyss by a glabrezu
Aura, the Air Genasi Storm Sorceress- accidental self-vaporization (bitch blew herself up)
Kyri, the Minotaur Scout- vaporized by a jackass

Fidget Stonegear, the Deep Gnome Inventor- big badda boom 

Miarielle, the Lythari Priestess of Corellon- bigger badda boom
Kazul, the Copper Dragonborn Shadow Monk of Bahamut- skull caved in by another rock from Fidget
Glabbagool, the Gelatinous Cube- stayed with the kobolds
Kara Reginleif, the Half-Valkyrie Wererat Champion from the Zhentarim who compulsively keeps everything she finds- vorpaled to pieces by demon Easter bunnies

Stool, the Myconid Child- unwilling dance partner to drunk stone giant

Rumpadump, the Myconid Child- frozen by demon Easter bunny

Friendly fire overall: 120
Party members killed: 21
Overall party members lost: 27

NOTE: Things will be mostly from Claire's perspective, anything with italics is from a third party, since the knight can't be everywhere at once.

***** Eleasias 23, 1489 DR (The Year of the Warrior Princess)

       We signed on as guards on Mattock Goldscales's caravan in exchange for him bringing us to Blingdenstone. Finally we could stop walking blindly, we had a guide who knew the way- and gave way better instructions than the mephit.

       That night at camp, during my watch with Tali and Thecker, we heard a gnome begin screaming. I jumped up, illuminated Dawnbringer, and bolted toward the sound. The gnome was being attacked by a jelly, and Dawnbringer sliced it up right away, saving the svirfneblin's life.

***** Eleasias 24

       About halfway through today's travels we reached a crossroad, and a couple of gnomes stepped out of the walls. This place is weird. One of them introduced himself as Dasco Pickshine, who was apparently part of the family that runs the mines. Dasco asked if he could send some stuff to Blingdenstone with us, and warned us against some odd ooze attacks. He said there were a lot of them, and many of them looked different- one looked and smelled like lava. Lovely. Just what we need.

       Dasco led us through the wall he'd emerged from- apparently it was an illusion- and we joined him for highsunfeast. As we ate more lizards were loaded up with the stuff Dasco wanted us to take. It was a pleasant little meal, and he proved to be interesting company- when he remembered to speak Undercommon.

       We continued on our way to Blingdenstone, and after another half hour or so we heard gooey, squishy noises coming from up ahead- probably oozes. We broke off from the caravan and began moving forward to find the source of the noise. The pudding before us looked like melted white chocolate- it was probably one of the odd ones Dasco had mentioned.

       Thecker opened fire on the pudding, but her bullets didn't seem to do much of anything to it. The pudding lashed out at Tali, and her flesh started melting off... not good... Tali couldn't see, her eyes were mostly melted away. Another pudding emerged and went for Thecker. Sajin stabbed it and got hit with back splash for his efforts- I doubt that did much to it. Thecker began shooting the one on her again, and seemed to really hurt it- then Turvy came in and killed it.

       I hacked at the pudding on Tali with Dawnbringer, trying to block any splatter from hitting Tali; I was badly hurt in the process, but I needed to protect my helpless friend. Thecker shot it a couple of times and it vanished.

       We decided to move slower for the rest of the day to keep an eye out for more oozes, and since we were so close to the city Mattock decided it would be best to just push into our normal resting time to get there that night.

       Finally we arrived at the gates of Blingdenstone, and found massive 300 foot tall stairs towering over us. At the top of the stairs was a colossal metal gate that was definitely built to withstand a siege. Honestly, Cormyr could benefit from the architecture of the svirfneblins. We got the carts and lizards set up on the cart lift, and everyone started climbing the stairs. Those stairs were not built for human sized feet, and it took Tali and I three times as long as everyone else to get to the top. I had to guide my poor, blind friend up these tiny steps, while Thecker heckled us because she's a bitch.

       Apparently kobolds were used as cannon fodder when the drow took Blingdenstone, and had been sent in to set off all the traps so that the drow could just get through the city without those. When she reached the top two boulders popped out of the ground- elementals- and grabbed hold of the priestess. Thecker managed to diffuse the situation by personally vouching for her, which if that means the same thing here as it does in Cormyr, it's Thecker's ass if Mezzem fucks up. It's a good thing the kobold is so mild mannered, and nothing like your typical kobold.

       When Tali and I finally reached the fucking top of these damned stairs- I really wish I could fly after that obnoxious climb- the 40 foot gates opened for us, and we were led through a maze. These gnomes really were careful- I am taking notes on how Cormyr could use something like this to help protect us, it feels like we're always at war. Eventually we arrived at another gate, with two stone towers flanking it, we went through that gate into another winding tunnel.

       "We left the dark tunnel behind and stepped into what looked like another world. These weren't sinister drow caverns or harsh, bare stone, but a subterranean land of warm colors and welcoming smells. The deep gnomes I saw going about their business glanced up at us with suspicion, but I instinctively understood we faced no threat here.

       "One of the guards escorting us abandoned his severe frown to give a deep nod as he prompted us past the inner gate. 'Welcome to Blingdenstone, travelers.'"* We decided the first place we needed to go was Thecker's home, so we could drop crap off. The tunnels were tight and unpleasant, especially since I was still acting as Tali's guide. Those shrinking mushrooms would have been useful here, too bad they were on Clover when she blew up. We dropped off our first bags, and headed back to the gates to begin unloading our lizards. Thecker suggested we stop at the temple first to see if the clerics there could help Tali.

       The temple in Blingdenstone was called the Ruby in the Rough, and is dedicated to the svirfneblin god of earth and nature: Segojan Earthcaller. The cleric who seemed to be running things was young and jumpy, and introduced himself to us as Glyphic Shroomlight. Unfortunately for Tali, Glyphic was too inexperienced to regenerate her eyes. He suggested we go to the Diggermattocks about that, they might have the resources to help m friend.

       Our next stop was Fidget's house, and he was even more disorganized than I had thought. That place requires some archaeologists or something. Thecker managed to get herself trapped in the damn room, and it took forever for us to get her free. We were tired, and just wanted to be done, so we decided to get the lizards back to Thecker's house using Tali's armor. I took the armor since I can move faster than her, and we smuggled all of our pack lizards back- this saved us from having to carrying all those bags individually.

       When we finally finished that, we went to the Foaming Mug and got good and drunk. We were finally done with traveling for a little while, I hoped, and would get a brief respite before heading to the surface.

***** Eleasias 25

       Right after morningfeast we headed over the the Diggermattocks to find out if they could help Tali. The Diggermattocks were the ones who led the expedition to reclaim Blingdenstone, and were essentially the rulers of the city. Their home was clearly a makeshift palace, and I knew as we approached that I needed to enter court mode. I couldn't lead our conversation because I knew they'd listen better to Thecker. I just hoped nobody ran their mouth and got us in trouble.

       "Two dozen or so occupy this well-lit cavern, some moving briskly with messenger pouches in hand while others huddle around several stone tables covered in maps and other papers, talking in hushed, serious tones. The back of the room was dominated by a dais carved from the rock of the cavern, atop which rest two stone desks facing each other. Two svirfneblin- one male, one female- sat behind the desks, conferring with advisers and each other. They turned their attention to us as we entered."* Dorbo and Senni Diggermattock greeted us, and were very interested in our adventures and the trials we faced to get here.

       We told them about that weird elemental circle the basilisks were in, they said the Stoneheart Enclave had been looking for something like that. While it was clear they weren't sure if they believed our story about the circle, they said they'd investigate it. After hearing our story about Seymour they were intrigued by us, and asked us for assistance on a few matters in the city.

       Dorbo told us there was a group of "vermin" that had taken over some of the old living quarters, and the House Center. He called them the Goldwhiskers, and from his description, they sounded like wererats; internally I was snickering about the irony of him ranting about the wererats while surrounded by them. Dorbo said they said they had been living in Blingdenstone since after the fall. He wanted them all exterminated, but Senni interjected that she would be fine with a parley. She said that even the Goldwhiskers were descendants of Blingdenstone's citizens and they had every right to rejoin the svirfneblin community. Since she was the political voice of the city, we opted for her desire to parley.

       The Diggermattocks also told us that they believed there was some sort of monster or magic in the unclaimed settlement that was responsible for the ooze attacks. We were tasked with tracking the oozes and figuring out what was causing the increase in attacks. I suppose it's a good thing Glabbagool went with the kobolds, he would have probably gotten a worse reception than Mezzem.

       They said if we helped them with these things they would help us get to the surface, but right now they were too taxed from so many threats surrounding the city. I hoped they would follow through, I miss the sun.

       Once we had finished up with them, we headed to the Trader's Grotto, the marketplace. Hopefully we'll find something that can help Tali, and something that'll regrow my fingers- holding a shield is almost impossible right now. The twins had to deliver some gems to a gnome named Kazook Pickshine, they had been given these for delivery back in Gracklstugh apparently. They found him quickly and made their delivery. Before we could really look around, a bell sounded and "the deep gnomes around us all drew weapons and retreated as I saw a guard stumble back, then rise up in the air. A strange shimmer around him revealed the surface of the gelatinous cube that engulfed him."*

       Thecker was closest to the cube, and as she ran at it, she almost ran into a second one. She skidded to a stop in front of it and plunged her sword into its gooey mass. Mezzem released a bolt of radiant energy at it that slightly illuminated it, and Turvy came in behind her, shooting his crossbow straight through it, leaving a hole in it. Sajin finished that one off, leaving us with the cube that held the guard. I propped Tali up against a pillar and told Yklwa to guard her, then I hurried up to the cube and slashed at it with Dawnbringer... I lost my grip on her and she fell into the damned cube. To make matters worse, the fucking cube slide onto me and I was now submerged in the acidic goo. It seemed to move for Thecker too, but the bitch dodged.

       Another fucking cube appeared and Thecker blasted the hell out of it, then Mezzem finished it off with a burst of radiant light. I managed to scramble out of the damned cube that held me, and stabbed it with my Thundersword, accidentally hitting the guard too... I think I killed him... The cube slithered forward again, moving to Mezzem and Thecker- both of them dodged out of the way, but Turvy was caught by it. Thecker plunged her sword into it, and hit Turvy in the process. Mezzem pulled the guard out of the cube, while Turvy scrambled out of it. In the chaos someone finished it off, but we were too late to save the poor guard. I retrieved Dawnbringer.

       The gnomes seemed impressed by us, and Thecker attempted to use that to our advantage in getting a regeneration item for Tali. She found one merchant who was acting shifty about it, and was charged through the nose for a pair of earrings that would fix Tali's eyes. I hoped that once her eyes were back, I'd be able to use them to regrow my fingers- though her sight came first. Being her guide was difficult, though we were becoming good friends as a result.

       Even though the merchants seemed impressed by us, none of them were willing to even acknowledge Mezzem, until she told Thecker. She ended up finding a blade that slays dragons.

       I found a merchant who had just sat down for second breakfast, and invited me to join him. We had a delightful conversation, and at the end of it he produced a beautiful mace. He called it the Rod of Lordly Might, and showed me its features. This mace could turn into a flame tongue, a spear, a battle axe, battering ram, ladder, and a compass. He said it could also drain someone's life force, paralyze someone, and terrify a group of people. If I wanted it I had to give up Dawnbringer, but he guaranteed she'd be on the surface by the end of the tenday if I did. I discussed it with her, and she really wanted to go to the surface sooner than I was getting there, and that rod would greatly help me. I was giving up my best friend, but I knew she would be safe and getting to where she needed to be. He also gave me a potion of longevity, and I got several years younger! I still needed a couple more potions to get closer to my actual age, but this was still better than before.

       We decided to wait until Tali could see before we went to take care of any of the tasks the Diggermattocks had given us.

***** Eleasias 26

        Since we were stuck waiting for Tali's eyes, we went to the Cave of Clatter today to commission some equipment. I ordered a chain from a smith called Dwarvenforge, so that I'd stop losing my weapon.

***** Eleasias 27

       We picked up our stuff from the smith today, and instead of payment, Dwarvenforge asked me to deliver a box to his kin in Gauntlgrym. He also made a casting to create a

       That night when we went to the Foaming Mug, there was a huge gathering in full swing, Tali jumped on the drums, apparently she didn't need to see to drum. There were also some interesting rumors floating around- about an influx of surface coins in Gracklstugh, some dancing myconids who talked about an upcoming wedding, the ghost problem in Blingdenstone was getting worse, the Stoneheart Enclave was closing on a solution to Ogremoch's Bane, and that some insane gnome who had disappeared during the beginnings of the reclamation had been seen near the unclaimed areas of Blingdenstone. Apparently a lot of stuff was happening in this city.

***** Eleasias 28

       This morning Tali could see white lights, she was getting closer to sight! Hopefully in another day or so we'd be able to go do something other than shopping or drinking.

       Toward the end of the day a mine collapsed, and Mezzem offered her services to clear it.

***** Eleasias 29

       Tali can finally see! We could finally set out to do something! We decided to deal with the Goldwhiskers first, but the tunnel we needed was- of course- the one that collapsed yesterday. There was a back entrance through the Reception Hall that would take us to them. The guards made a point to stress that there was no aid beyond those doors for us, which we understood. It was time to meet the wererats.

Photo from Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast

Photo from Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast

*Author's note: Many of the events, locations and characters that occur in this story are from the Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast. Anything with an asterisk next to it is a quote from the book.

Life of a Chultan: Natali

       I was born in a small cave hidden by mounds of brush and foliage, on the side of the Mist Cliffs of the island of Chult. Five of us cubs in total, however my sister- Sana, brother- Osaw, and I quickly noticed we were not average tigers like our mother and two other siblings. We were smarter, could speak with one another in ways they could not. The three of us had the ability to learn from the humanoids to use their dialects as well as our feline language. Around age one, Sana and I learned our talkative brother was different from us as well, for we could become human, where as he could not. Eventually, she and I learned we are therinthropes, tigers with the ability to look human, spirit guides chosen by Ubtao. 

When we were around two years old, we all went our own separate ways. I decided to travel the island, roaming the forest, coasts, and mountains, learning what I could from the nature and the spread out tribes around me. After about three years of travelling, I found my way to Mezro, and as it turned out, Sana. After we left our mother, she told me, she left for the biggest cities she could find, knowing how loved we were among humans, she intended to have the easy life most tigers never have. Her arrival in Mezro changed a lot for the town, as she relished in how revered our kind is among the tribes and took full advantage of everything they offered her, she and I were chosen, and therefore have even more power than the lords. She wanted me to join her there. I refused. 

I continued my travels, eventually meeting a deinonychus and after spending some time together, we became friends. I named him Yklwa, the word the humans use for spear, for he is my spear and I am the arrow, together a deadly pair. 

A few more years passed, finding myself in the area of Mezro yet again, I stopped in to visit my sister, and this time, she had changed drastically. Gone was the easy going, lazy, yet power hungry, sibling I had known, replaced with a malevolent, angry, evil tiger, the kind that would eat her own young if she felt they slightly threatened by their presence. Something had corrupted her, touched her very soul and burnt it to the core. I left Mezro and vowed never to return to that wretched place.

Around age 22, I found myself near the Peaks of Flame, never having entered the mountains after hearing the stories of the monsters that lie within. This time, I entered. It was a huge mistake as within a few days I found myself in a fight Yklwa and I could not win, so I pulled him into his own plane as I continued fighting many demons at once, and then, there was smoke. A deep fog surrounded me; I could see vague outlines of the demons that were, just moments ago, trying to kill us. They have carried me with them now for many years; it seems I may never find a way out.

Photo by Desiree Knight

Tales from Toril- The Underdark Escapees: Book One, Chapter Nineteen

Demon Easter Bunnies

Dramatis Personae:

Thecker Powdercraft, the Deep Gnome Wererat Gunslinger and Inquisitor of Bahamut
Lady Claire Thundersword, the Human Wererat Swordcaptain of the Purple Dragon Knights and wielder of Dawnbringer who is the only thing she trusts and has an imaginary personality in addition to the real one, and who compulsively collects trophies from slain foes
Hans, Claire's Basalt Wolf Figurine
Kara Reginleif, the Half-Valkyrie Wererat Champion from the Zhentarim who compulsively keeps everything she finds
Sajin Silvertongue, the Deep Gnome Wererat Assassin who can't sneak
Mezzem, the Kobold Wererat Priestess of Bahamut
Natali, the Tiger Therinthrope Beastmaster
Yklwa, Tali's Deinonychus animal companion

Topsy and Turvy, the Deep Gnome Wererat Rogue Twins

Stool, the Myconid Child

Rumpadump, the Myconid Child

Comrades we have lost:

Ront, the Orc Fighter- turned into hamburger by Pwent

Buppido, the Derro- smashed by Orvald

Eldeth Feldrun, the Shield Dwarf- killed during escape

Hera Adaar, the Abyssal Tiefling Wild Sorceress- swept away

Luna Trelawny, the Human Divination Wizard- skull caved in by rock thrown by Fidget, then finished off by black pudding

Sarith Zekarit, the Drow Scout- drowned

Phillip Johnson, the Human Cleric- in a seemingly irreversible coma, left in Hemeth's care

Jim Jar, the Deep Gnome- eaten by grell

Prince Derendil, the Quaggoth- killed by sea troll

Shuushar, the "Awakened" Kuo-toa- turned into shuushi by sea troll

Hemeth, the Duergar Arms Dealer- parted with group in Gracklstugh
Thimblepwent Battlehammer, the Dwarven Battlerager Barbarian- turned into dog food
Orvald Abershaw, the Mousefolk Barbarian- became a squeaky toy last seen in Bahamutsville under Zin-carla
Zenit 'Dracon, the Drow Fighter- abandoned the party because Orvald died last seen in Bahamutsville
Lythana Belmyr, the Half-Drow Blood Hunter of Eilistraee- sacrificed to Demogorgon
Codsworth, the polite Flumph- shredded by crossbow
Zarrus, the Tiefling Favored Soul Sorcerer of Mephisto- vanished during gnoll fight
Ol' Sparky, the Deep Dragon- last seen thrown into a portal to the Abyss by a glabrezu
Aura, the Air Genasi Storm Sorceress- accidental self-vaporization (bitch blew herself up)
Kyri, the Minotaur Scout- vaporized by a jackass

Fidget Stonegear, the Deep Gnome Inventor- big badda boom 

Miarielle, the Lythari Priestess of Corellon- bigger badda boom
Kazul, the Copper Dragonborn Shadow Monk of Bahamut- skull caved in by another rock from Fidget
Glabbagool, the Gelatinous Cube and a great warrior- stayed with the kobolds

Friendly fire overall: 119

NOTE: Things will be mostly from Claire's perspective, anything with italics is from a third party, since the knight can't be everywhere at once.

***** Eleasias 17, 1489 DR (The Year of the Warrior Princess)

       With the moon finally over, we packed up to continue our trek to Blingdenstone. The svirfneblin thought we were about three days away from their city.

       When we came to a Y in the tunnel, we heard some odd sounds coming from the passage that the twins had marked as not to go down. Sajin said it was Terran being spoken by a mephit, Thecker used a spell to understand it, and said it sounded like the mephit was leading an earth elemental. As soon as she said that it came around the corner, elemental in tow; they said it was a dust mephit, it was actually really cute.

       Thecker offered the mephit a ruby in exchange for directions to Blingdenstone. In her introductions I guess, she explained to it what gunpowder is, so it instead asked for some of that. She told it she didn't have enough to spare, so it had her tell its elemental what she needed, and it produced a ton of ingredients. I wish I could have understood that conversation, it must have been interesting.

       The mephit led us to a faerzress cavern and opened up what looked like a giant geode in the ground- a secure resting place for Thecker to make it gunpowder. The center of this geode had really strong gravity, strong enough that Mezzem decided to attempt to fly in it... she got stuck right in the middle of the geode. Sajin threw a rock at Mezzem's shield, and the kobold went spinning wildly, folding herself around the shield, gripping it so tightly her blood circulation was probably disrupted in her fingers. Thecker decided to shoot the shield to get Mezzem to stop spinning before she got sick, her shot was true and it did. At this point it was pretty obvious that Mezzem was done, so I chucked my grapple at her, and Kara and I reeled her in.

       Our new friend drew us a map to Blingdenstone, and it looked like we were about three days away, as we had thought. Sajin had shot poisoned arrows at Mezzem while she was stuck, and Turvy, being overly possessive of her drugged Sajin as revenge. 

       As everyone slept that night, Thecker saw the mephit going through everyone's packs. She didn't say anything to it or anyone else about it, and no one seemed to notice anything missing the next day.

***** Eleasias 18

       The next morning we parted with the mephit and began following its map to Blingdenstone. About halfway through the day the tunnel began feeling warmer and hazy, and it smelled of smoke. As we noticed it, the twins came back and told us there was a lava flow up ahead with a mushroom forest ablaze from it. We had to cross the damned thing, it was a major landmark on our map- the only question was how.

       We were facing a river of lava, with no section narrow enough for us to pass over easily. There were some stalagmites sticking out of it, but we couldn't get to them. Mezzem said she could move the stones to form a bridge across for us. Kara decided to fly over and check it out first, to make sure nothing was lurking on the other side, ready to pounce the moment we crossed. As she flew across, she saw something glinting on one of the stalagmites and decided to get it- it looked like a gemstone. 

       The other side of the flow was pretty much the same as the side the rest of the party was on, but Kara did discover that a series of the stalagmites would work to make a bridge across. Kara came back and showed us this stone she found. It kind of looked like a diamond, but there was smoke in it, and as I watched, the smoke shifted. Mezzem said it was some sort of abjuration thing, and she'd figure it out later- cause Kara and I totally know what abjuration is.

       Topsy came up with a different way of getting everyone across that wouldn't tax Mezzem's magical energy. She had a ritual spell in her book called Tenser's Floating Disc, and she had Kara cast it- which was kind of funny- because the disc would follow whoever cast the spell, so she could just fly back and forth and take us one by one. It would be a lot of flying, but she'd get to stretch her wings, which she's always bitching she doesn't get to do enough.

       First Kara did a test trip across with the disc empty, to make sure this would work. There wasn't any trouble, so she came back and took Topsy's phantom lizard across. When Kara landed she saw a disturbance in the ground and smoke rising. We saw two figures seem to rise out of the ground, and another two out of the smoke, on the side that Kara was on. They looked like enormous bunnies... All four of them dove for Kara and began ripping her apart; I watched in horror, knowing there was nothing I could do to save her. By the time the bunnies were done with her, all that was left of Kara was a bloody torso. 

       The gem in Mezzem's pocket began to pulse. One of the bunnies leapt across the lava flow, as if it were the size of a creek, not a river, and landed on Thecker. Thecker noticed a red glint in its mouth as its jaws closed on her. The next bunny followed its friend's example of leaping across the lava, but this one landed on Mezzem's lizard. Stool and Rumpadump rode in saddle bags on her lizard since she's the lightest, and I saw Rumpadump dismount, but poor Stool found himself trapped under the lizard as it was knocked prone.

       The bunny's head swooped down to bite Mezzem's leg, and I threw my shield at it, intercepting the blow... the fucker broke my shield. As it snapped in half a mad cackling rang out in the cavern and something came out of the broken halves, whooshing away before we could determine what it was. Mezzem recognized the presence that left Claire's shield as something powerful and demonic. Claire had been trying to understand the shield for days, and it seemed that presence was a vital clue to understanding it. If that bunny's teeth could do that to my shield, I shudder to think what it would have done to Mezzem if I hadn't intercepted.

       With my shield missing, I drew my Thundersword and used it alongside Dawnbringer against the bunny that broke my shield. Following the loud crackle of thunder that came from my sword was a bang! as if a small explosion went off. Sajin had drawn his sword, setting off the gunpowder trap the mephit had left there the night before. Turvy hurled a ball of fire at the bunny, but it didn't seem to do much.

       I looked up just as another bunny flew across the flow and landed on me. Clover was knocked over, and I quickly rolled off of her, accidentally putting myself right in the smoke from the forest fire- everything was hazy and partially obscured. The damned rabbit decided to try to eat Clover instead, and she was barely standing when it was done.

       The final bunny landed on Sajin and knocked him over. Thecker opened fire on the bunny on top of her, and it responded by jumping straight up and landing right on top of her. Its teeth snapped at her, but somehow missed the gunslinger. On the ground where it had been before jumping was an egg that smelled like chocolate. She grabbed the egg and hurled it at the bunny, partially blinding it, then with a burst of light the egg released lightning on Thecker and Sajin, stunning Thecker. 

       The bunny on Mezzem jumped over her to put itself behind Turvy and Rumpadump; it bit into the sprout and he froze. I slashed at the bunny in front of me, protecting Clover from it, but she ran off into the smoke, terrified of the beast. The bunny jumped to land behind me, and thankfully it missed biting me. Sajin stabbed wildly at his bunny, while it hopped over him, landing atop both him and his lizard- injuring the lizard so badly that it began to bleed out.

       Mezzem saw the silhouette of a tiger pacing inside the gem, and she held it out willing the stone's power at the bunny on her. Smoke billowed from the gem, and in the bunny's place, a white tiger stood. Turvy stabbed his bunny as it jumped over him to attack the tiger, Tali. I continued hacking at the bunny in front of me, hoping I could kill it before it bit me. Sajin stabbed a bunny in the eye, killing it, and it turned into smoke, leaving the cavern through the same path as the being from Claire's shield. The bunny I was locked in combat with jumped, and I slashed it with Dawnbringer before it could get away. It went about ten feet up before plummeting right back down- it almost landed on Mezzem.

       An egg had been left behind when it the bunny jumped, and it exploded in a burst of icy air- which was kind of refreshing in this sweltering cavern. The bunny Thecker had been fighting bit her, and the stunned svirfneblin couldn't avoid its vorpal maw; she fell unconscious and began to bleed out. The bunny jumped to Topsy next. Another egg exploded- this one in a burst of flames- setting Thecker, her lizard, and Kara's lizard, Falcor, aflame. Tali pounced on it and knocked it over. Falcor rolled on the stone to put himself out, while Mezzem put the flames on Thecker out and revived her. 

       I finally slashed through the bunny on me, killing the damned thing. Sajin stabbed the final one through the eye and finished it off. I decided that the teeth would make an excellent trophy, and reached in to pry one loose. Apparently I didn't have a good grip on it, because it neatly sliced through all of the fingers on my left hand. Overwhelming pain drew me to my knees as I called for Mezzem's aid.

       Thecker went looking for Clover in the smoke, and found her dead. My poor lizard. Almost everything that I'd packed on her was destroyed.

       We inspected the gem that the tiger, Tali, had come out of, and could make out the shape of the damned bunny within it. Sajin suggested we throw it in the lava, and the damned thing floated. We decided it would be best to just collect it and hang on to it for later. Apparently Tali had been trapped in that thing for a couple centuries, poor thing. Somehow she isn't completely mad, which is very impressive, I doubt I'd leave something like that with my sanity intact.

       Since we no longer had someone to fly across the lava flow with that floating disc of Topsy's, we decided to have Mezzem magically shape a stone bridge across the stalagmites. The very last bit of it snapped under her weight, but she managed to make it across safely. We all made it over safely, but Sajin's poor lizard's feet were badly burned, messing up his suction and making climbing almost impossible, the poor thing had trouble walking in general.

***** Eleasias 19

       We spent today looking for the marker that would put us on the path to Blingdenstone. Eventually we found a small pyramid of stones that looked like it marked the way, but it wasn't. I led us down the wrong path, and by the time we figured it out and turned back, it was near time to make camp. Our entire travel for today was wasted because the damn gnomes hide the true path to their stupid city.

       That night during Thecker and Topsy's watch, the mephit visited again, and told her which path was the correct one. 

***** Eleasias 20

       As Sajin drew his blade, it exploded again, apparently that mephit had trapped his sword again. This time his scabbard was completely fucked up- I think it used more powder this time. I love that it was trapping Sajin's stuff, it was hilarious.

       We wasted another day going down the wrong path, this time per Thecker and Topsy's insistence. Once again we got back to the main road in time for camp. I'm starting to hate Blingdenstone.

       At camp tonight, Sajin pretended to be the voice of Bahamut, and told Thecker to shoot herself with a silver bullet. He's a really bad actor, and he found himself way too amusing, his giggling ruined the joke. Thecker shot him with the silver instead, and Topsy told him to use his dagger to get the bullet out... it exploded when he drew it. That mephit is ridiculous, there's got to be other travelers for it to prank.

***** Eleasias 21

       We finally found the correct path, which was right next to where we had been camping for the last three fucking nights. Of course it was right next to us and we missed it. I hate the stupid Underdark.

       After traveling for about 6 hours we came across some faces carved into the tunnel, of male and female deep gnomes. I hoped that meant we were still on the right path.

       Sajin and Turvy took us down the wrong path today, and we lost a bunch of time, again.

***** Eleasias 22

       We were on the right path, we hoped, when suddenly everything went black. I activated Dawnbringer and she merely reflected the darkness- great, another rocktopus, at least that meant good dinner tonight. As I registered this thought there was an explosion from her hilt- that damned mephit- and I dropped her. I heard Sajin grunt in surprise, and thought I could tell where it was, so I blindly attacked. I know I connected with something, but I don't know if I hit him or the rocktopus.

       Mezzem dispelled the darkness and we were greeted to the sight of Sajin grappled by the beast. I scooped up Dawnbringer and we all made quick work of the rocktopus- Topsy got the killing blow. Claire hadn't actually grabbed Dawnbringer, but instead the imaginary version. The real Dawnbringer landed a couple feet away, and Thecker found her. As the mad Purple Dragon lectured her sword about splitting, she asked Thecker to fix Claire's madness. 

       As I put Dawnbringer back together, I wish she'd quit splitting like that, Mezzem whacked me in the head and I felt the power of Bahamut pulse through me. I have no idea what she did. Mezzem had cured Claire's compulsion to collect trophies from things she kills, her imaginary Dawnbringer stayed in place.

       We entered a large cavern on a ledge, above a chamber that was lined with stalagmites, with a huge magic circle in the center. The svirfneblin said this was an elemental earth circle, it was some sort of containment. They didn't know they were looking at Entemoch's Boon, a summoning circle that was once used to summon the elemental earth prince, Entemoch, and his presence had left a permanent imprint of magical energy. It was lost during the drow invasion of Blingdenstone, and many think it's just a myth at this point.

       While the rest of us were looking at the circle, Sajin was debating if he could survive falling off the ledge. He started making some stupid jokes about it, then flipped around and randomly insulted me. I don't know what his fucking problem is, but I'm sick of him using Surfacer as a derogatory term. Mezzem grabbed Sajin by the throat and held him right on the edge of the cliff. As the ass continued to insult me, I told her that if she didn't throw him off the ledge, I would. She dropped him, and he ended up with a limp for the next few days. Unfortunately our wererat resistances allowed him to jump without being hurt beyond that.

       The rest of us climbed down the ledge on our lizards. Since we had to leave Sajin's mutilated lizard up there, Mezzem elected to leave hers up there too; she didn't want to bring Stool down until we had explored and found the way we needed to travel. The lad had become so quiet since the loss of Rumpadump, he barely spoke anymore, and pretty much refused to leave his bag. I had tried to commiserate with him, since I know what losing your best friend feels like, but he didn't want to speak; out energetic, perpetually curious sprout was gone, and what had been left behind was an empty shell, I wish there was something I could do for the child,

       It looked like there used to be a bunch of statues in this chamber, that had long since been broken. There were pieces of stone vermin, nugs, and bats scattered everywhere. I wonder what happened here. Mezzem lifted the monocle she had gotten from the beholder and scanned the room looking through it. We heard a growl behind us, and I turned, then felt myself freezing up as stone started creeping up me. It was a basilisk behind them, the party had invaded its lair. 

       Everyone began averting their eyes, while Mezzem struck it with a spell. Seymour's monocle made her immune to its abilities. I saw the beast slash at Topsy, as another growl came from behind me- there were two of these things. Shit. That one slashed at Tali with its claws, and poisoned the ranger. I managed to shake off the petrification, only to immediately be hit by another one. This was not going well. Thecker realized they didn't have a chance of getting out of this alive if nobody could see the basilisks to attack them. She opened her eyes and opened fire on it. I heard the bang of Thecker's gun, followed by a roar of pain- she had hit it and it was hurt. Good.

       Sajin was bitten and clawed at by the other one, and he swung his blade to retaliate... completely missing his mark. I managed to shake off the petrification again, and was able to close my eyes before it could hit me again. I asked Dawnbringer to guide my hand, and swung in the direction she indicated. My blade connected with something, so I guess that was the right decision. Claire had hit Tali, and she accidentally looked at the basilisk in her surprise, she began turning to stone.

       I felt the swipe of its claws and it pinch of its teeth, I could feel the blood pouring out of me as it pulled away. Topsy killed the one Thecker had shot, she shoved it, and its body landed on top of Sajin. I swung Dawnbringer again, I know I hit it at least once. She had hit Mezzem... Turvy moved to stab Claire for accidentally hitting Mezzem, and instead began turning to stone. Tali was unable to shake off the petrification, and was completely a statue now. Mezzem summoned her spirit blade and killed the basilisk. I felt something go whizzing past me, it had to be the basilisk- I swung Dawnbringer and felt her connect with it again- Claire once again stabbed Mezzem. Turvy became solid stone, and his sister began stabbing the dead beast's eyes over and over, taking her anger of her brother being stone out on it. They said the fight was over, and I opened my eyes to see both Turvy and Tali as solid stone, with Mezzem curled around Turvy's legs, in meditation- regaining the magical energy to revive him.

       While the rest of us collected ourselves from this battle, we heard several thuds, and an exclamation of either pain or surprise- I couldn't tell. The lizards came running toward us, whatever made that noise had spooked them. As Thecker and I went toward the noise, we saw a small dust cloud, and something inside it bellowed. There were some red patches on the ground that I think were blood, and the silhouette of something huge began standing.

       It was a stone giant who was completely drunk. He called himself Gront Stonefist, and screamed that Thecker that she had broken his keg. Gront clumsily swung his club at Thecker, and missed, tripping on nothing and landed with another thud on the ground next to us. She climbed on top of it to pin it down, and Sajin decided to whack it in the back of the head. I gave it a bottle of Gresyl wine to make up for its lost keg- and the shithead bit me in the process of taking it from me. It swallowed the bottle whole and demanded more. As Thecker produced another bottle, fucking Sajin swung at it again, and hit Thecker instead. The bottle she had just pulled out crashed and broke at my feet- Sajin had just destroyed the our attempts to befriend it- what in the Nine Hells was he thinking? Oh right, he wasn't, because he doesn't think about anything except himself.

       I pulled a new bottle out for it, but the drunk bastard punched Thecker for breaking that bottle. Thanks Sajin. It was screaming at her for breaking its booze, so she chucked a vial of something at it- which bounced off its lip. I touched Dawnbringer to it and sobered it up, which only made matters worse... It got up and began screaming "mine" as it ran toward the statues of Turvy and Tali. Thecker shot him so he couldn't destroy our friends, and accidentally killed him.

       We went back to where it had fallen and found the remains of Mezzem and Sajin's lizards, and inside Stool's bag we found his smashed corpse. Poor child.

***** Eleasias 23

       When Mezzem finally came out of her meditation, she revived Turvy, then went right back into it to regain the magic for Tali. I gathered up everything we had on the dead lizards that had survived the fall, and began redistributing everything. Topsy helped me repair our saddle bags, using the clothing the giant was wearing, and then gave me shit for the next two hours while I took an inventory of what we had left. We were down to Skitter, the twin's lizard, Thecker's lizard, and Falcor, who is now my lizard. It was difficult, but I managed to redistribute everything, and we lost so much of our supplies. I hoped we'd reach Blingdenstone soon.

       While we waited for Mezzem, Thecker used her pandemonium amulet, and Topsy dropped into hysterical laughter for the next few minutes. That thing was fucking weird. I found three perfectly round stones, and gave one to Tali and one to Mezzem, keeping one for myself. I didn't know what they did, but they seemed like something we should keep.

       When Mezzem was finally done rejuvenating her magic, she revived Tali. Topsy spent some time at the circle, and summoned all of us elemental lizards, they were really fucking cool.

       Shortly after we continued on our way to Blingdenstone, we met a svirfneblin caravan heading toward there. They agreed to take us to town if we acted as guards. We should reach Blingdenstone much quicker now, I hope.

Photo from Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast

*Author's note: Many of the events, locations and characters that occur in this story are from the Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast.

Tales from Toril- The Underdark Escapees: Book One, Chapter Eighteen

Moon Madness

Dramatis Personae:

Thecker Powdercraft, the Deep Gnome Gunslinger and Inquisitor of Bahamut
Lady Claire Thundersword, the Human Swordcaptain of the Purple Dragon Knights and wielder of Dawnbringer who is the only thing she trusts and has an imaginary personality in addition to the real one, and who compulsively collects trophies from slain foes
Hans, Claire's Basalt Wolf Figurine
Kara Reginleif, the Half-Valkyrie Champion from the Zhentarim who compulsively keeps everything she finds
Sajin Silvertongue, the Deep Gnome Assassin who can't sneak
Mezzem, the Kobold Priestess of Bahamut

Topsy and Turvy, the Deep Gnome Wererat Rogue Twins

Stool, the Myconid Child

Rumpadump, the Myconid Child

Comrades we have lost:

Ront, the Orc Fighter- turned into hamburger by Pwent

Buppido, the Derro- smashed by Orvald

Eldeth Feldrun, the Shield Dwarf- killed during escape

Hera Adaar, the Abyssal Tiefling Wild Sorceress- swept away

Luna Trelawny, the Human Divination Wizard- skull caved in by rock thrown by Fidget, then finished off by black pudding

Sarith Zekarit, the Drow Scout- drowned

Phillip Johnson, the Human Cleric- in a seemingly irreversible coma, left in Hemeth's care

Jim Jar, the Deep Gnome- eaten by grell

Prince Derendil, the Quaggoth- killed by sea troll

Shuushar, the "Awakened" Kuo-toa- turned into shuushi by sea troll

Hemeth, the Duergar Arms Dealer- parted with group in Gracklstugh
Thimblepwent Battlehammer, the Dwarven Battlerager Barbarian- turned into dog food
Orvald Abershaw, the Mousefolk Barbarian- became a squeaky toy last seen in Bahamutsville under Zin-carla
Zenit 'Dracon, the Drow Fighter- abandoned the party because Orvald died last seen in Bahamutsville
Lythana Belmyr, the Half-Drow Blood Hunter of Eilistraee- sacrificed to Demogorgon
Codsworth, the polite Flumph- shredded by crossbow
Zarrus, the Tiefling Favored Soul Sorcerer of Mephisto- vanished during gnoll fight
Ol' Sparky, the Deep Dragon- last seen thrown into a portal to the Abyss by a glabrezu
Aura, the Air Genasi Storm Sorceress- accidental self-vaporization (bitch blew herself up)
Kyri, the Minotaur Scout- vaporized by a jackass

Fidget Stonegear, the Deep Gnome Inventor- big badda boom 

Miarielle, the Lythari Priestess of Corellon- bigger badda boom
Kazul, the Copper Dragonborn Shadow Monk of Bahamut- skull caved in by another rock from Fidget
Glabbagool, the Gelatinous Cube and a great warrior- stayed with the kobolds

Friendly fire overall: 112
Party members killed: 18
Overall party members lost: 24

NOTE: Things will be mostly from Claire's perspective, anything with italics is from a third party, since the knight can't be everywhere at once.

*****  Eleasias 9, 1489 DR (The Year of the Warrior Princess)

       As we neared the end of our travels today, the twins reported a weird sign in the tunnel ahead of us. They thought it was written in drow, but none of us understood drow s we had no way to translate it. Unfortunately there was no other way for us to go in this tunnel at the moment, so we had no choice but to press forward and hope the sign wasn't warning of a trap or something.

       A few minutes later, Thecker said she heard some yips, howls, and grunts coming from up ahead in the tunnel, and decided to go investigate. Of course we wouldn't let Thecker go alone, so we left Kara with the lizards and myconids, and went to investigate.

       We walked into a cavern that was unnaturally dark, but Thecker insisted we use her puny light spell before I activated Dawnbringer. We saw some shadows move briefly before the light dimmed- then I got to activate my friend, bathing the cavern in her brilliant sunlight. Thecker spotted a shadow demon and opened fire on it, while another one swiped its arm through me- my mind screamed out in pain. The demon Thecker was shooting possessed her. As I sliced through the demon in front of me, making it cry out in pain as pieces of it fell off in a puff of steam, I realized the yipping was getting closer- whatever it was, it was likely attracted by Thecker's gunfire.

       Mezzem's spirit blade appeared before me and hacked out more chunks of the demon, while Thecker turned her gun on Topsy- shit, another damned possession. Four dretches came barreling into the cavern, and Sajin turned to attack them. I saw a billow of shadow erupt from Thecker as she kicked the demon out of her body. The shadow in front of me rushed towards me, likely intent on possessing me, and I cleaved through it with Dawnbringer, it vanished in a cloud of steam and howl of rage.

       I heard a buzzing noise from above me, it made my mind foggy, and I couldn't think. Claire and Sajin fell unconscious from the buzzing emitted by hellwasps. One of the wasps dove toward Mezzem, and missed her completely. The demon Thecker had expelled turned and attacked her as soon as it was out, while another hellwasp dove toward the gunslinger. Mezzem hurled a bolt of radiant light at the wasp, hurting it, but not nearly as bad as she had hoped to. Topsy began ripping into the wasp that had dove at Thecker while Thecker finished off the shadow demon. 

       Turvy began climbing the wasp that was attacking Mezzem, while the priestess reached out and grabbed it, using the same necrotic spell that she had used to slay behir with. Topsy shot the wasp on her and Thecker with her crossbow, and Thecker's bullets finished it off. The one on Mezzem stabbed into her with its stinger, and the kobold cried out in pain. 

       A quasit appeared and attacked Thecker, Topsy responded by decapitating the demon. Thecker drew her sword to stab one of the dretches, and stabbed Sajin in the leg instead... the assassin awoke to Thecker's blade in him. Sajin got up and killed the dretch Thecker had been aiming for.

       Turvy stabbed his blade into the hellwasps eye, and rode it down to the ground, cleaving its brain in two. Thecker decapitated the final dretch, eliminating the last of the foes. Sajin got sick from the stench of the dretches, and vomited all over the ground; Thecker shoved the assassin into his own sick as soon as he finished. 

       I awoke to Thecker and Topsy standing over me; they said the battle was over and it was time to keep traveling. I hate missing fights, but at least everyone made it out in one piece. We traveled for another hour before finding an excellent campsite.

**** Eleasias 11

        Thecker had gotten some weird amulet from the beholder's stash that did random things when she said "Pandemonium." This morning it started making an obnoxious buzzing noise, so naturally Thecker decided to chase Sajin with it; this lasted for about an hour, and it was kind of surprising that Sajin didn't go mad because of it. When she was done tormenting Sajin we packed up and hit the road again.


       As we traveled we heard the familiar yipping of dretches behind us, I hoped we were far enough ahead of that that the demons wouldn't catch up. It was around that time that we realized we had no idea where the Hells we were on the map again. While we consulted it, the yipping began to fade away, as the demons moved farther away from us; within an hour there was nothing but the eerie silence of the Underdark surrounding us again.

       At camp that night the twins figured out where exactly we were on the stupid map again.

***** Eleasias 12

       All day we heard dretches yipping in the tunnels behind us, but we always seemed to be moving away from us. By the time we stopped to make camp the sounds were gone again.

       At camp Turvy and Mezzem were sparring, when she used a spell that put the rock on his feet, holding him in place. He had been flirting with Mezzem and attempting to woo her for some time now, and once she had him stuck, he asked what she would do with him now that she caught him. To my surprise, the priestess responded by throwing herself at him. Turvy had finally succeeded in wooing Mezzem.

***** Eleasias 13

       We didn't hear the dretches at all today, which was a welcome change from feeling like we needed to be constantly looking over our shoulders for the demons.

       As we traveled, enjoying the peace, Thecker and I spotted some movement up ahead, just before everything went black. I activated Dawnbringer, but she was unable to penetrate the darkness, it was as if the darkness was reflecting back at her blade- odd. Thecker heard something slosh past her just as Mezzem dispelled the darkness around herself, Thecker, and Claire. The darkness surrounding me seemed to evaporate, not just blink out like normal darkness spells do. A large slimy thing was in front of me, it kind of looked like an octopus, it was coming straight at Thecker- I stepped up and slashed it with Dawnbringer. It was two giant rocktopi attacking the party.

       I realized that darkness still surrounded the others, as Thecker pulled out a wand and killed the rocktopus with a barrage of magic missiles. Within the other ball of darkness the rocktopus grabbed Sajin with its tentacles. Mezzem removed the other darkness, and we saw another rocktopus lurking behind it, one tentacle gripping Sajin... of course it was Sajin that it had captured. I cut the jackass free with Dawnbringer while Thecker finished it off.

       We decided it was close enough to camp time for us to just stay where the rocktopi had ambushed us, plus that allowed us to cut them up and fry them for dinner. The calamari that they produce is just as good as what the octopi on the surface do.

       Mezzem realized she had a scroll that had been a parting gift from Kibbik that she had never opened. It was a fucking map of the region. She had been carrying around a fucking map this entire time we had been lost. Wow... just, wow...

***** Eleasias 14

       The next morning Mezzem was woken up to a chromatic orb from Topsy, a revenge prank for having a fucking map the entire damned time. She threatened to do it to Sajin too, but apparently the jackass was already awake.

       Around the middle of the day I began feeling sluggish and feverish, and I soon learned that the others did too. The calamari must not have been as good as we thought. About an hour later we began hearing the stupid dretches again, and I hoped they wouldn't catch up to us until we felt a bit better; I didn't want to face them feeling this crummy.

       The twins found us a lovely cave that was up on a ledge to camp in, and we hoped that we would be high enough up that the stupid dretches would just pass by- if they caught up to us at all. We all felt steadily crummier as the day progressed- except for Kara for some reason. I guess the half-valkyrie has a more hardened stomach than the rest of us.

       When my watch ended that night, I always take first watch since I'm fucking old now, as I went to wake Sajin for his turn, I suddenly felt light-headed, and everything went black.

***** Eleasias 15

       I woke up super itchy this morning, but it seemed my fever had broken. The others said they were itchy too, except Kara, who felt completely fine. The last thing I remembered was going to wake up Sajin, and somehow I had ended  up out of my armor and tucked into my bedroll. Topsy insisted that everyone had their watch last night, but I was the only one who remembered doing one- and Thecker only remembered mine too. She had gotten something from the beholder that made it so she didn't have to sleep anymore, so Thecker was on all the watches now.

       Sajin, being the coward that he is, insisted we stay in the cave today instead of traveling, in case the dretches came back. Since we were all feeling fine, other than being itchy, we ignored his idea and packed up to keep moving forward.

       About halfway through our travel we reached a cavern that was a hub where several tunnels intersected. Two of the paths had X's written on them in chalk, meaning the twins had gone down them, and found they weren't the way we were supposed to go. We had absolutely no idea which tunnel they were currently scouting down. Sajin began insisting we do some scouting of our own, so he went ahead with Thecker, while Mezzem, Kara, and I stayed behind with the myconids and lizards.

       While we waited, I began hearing dretches yipping again, and with so many tunnels intersecting here, there was no way we could tell where they were coming from. Sajin and Thecker emerged from the tunnel they had checked out, just as Topsy came barreling out of one yelling "demons!" Dretches poured out of the tunnel behind her.

       Mezzem, Sajin, and I dropped one each with ease as they emerged. We all worked methodically, clearing out all of them fairly quickly, except for one stubborn one, who managed to poison Sajin and I- though Dawnbringer could fix that for me quickly enough. The dretch dropped Sajin before we could kill it. Kara finished it off.

      I heard that annoying buzzing sound again, as a hellwasp came out of the tunnel and went straight for Thecker, hurting her badly. She reciprocated the attack, beating the hell out of it with her blade. As she sliced it, suddenly Thecker turned into a humanoid rat... looking just like how the twins do when they shift... What the hell was happening now? The change seemed to give Thecker renewed strength, and she finished the wasp off. Topsy had changed Thecker during sex- it was intentional. 

       Mezzem was laying unconscious, though it didn't look like she'd been hurt- probably the stupid wasp's doing. A large six-armed, beautiful snake-woman emerged from the tunnel, yelling that we had killed her demons and would be their replacements in death. She took up what appeared to be a defensive stance right in front of me. This was a marilith.

       I saw Thecker- still a rat- revive Sajin, as Turvy emerged from a different tunnel. In my head the woman's voice rang out "so you want to cross blades with the master; very well," as she turned and attacked Kara and I- then she scooped Sajin up with her tail. Shit.

       Thecker opened fire on the marilith, while Kara, Sajin, and I began slashing at her with our blades. The bitch teleported to the other side of the room and opened a portal, another marilith emerged from it. The new marilith went right for Kara, I was able to disrupt one blow from hitting her with my shield, but the other five connected before she grabbed the champion with her tail. Thecker unleashed a barrage of magic missiles at the first one, while she turned to attack our unconscious cleric. The strike woke Mezzem up, and the demon turned and began cutting into Kara- they really didn't like her. She attempted to grab me, but my feet danced away from her grasp.

       The other marilith knocked out Sajin's lizard, but Mezzem stabilized the poor thing before it died completely. One blow from the first one landed on Kara, and I saw her go limp, just as the sword struck me. With Claire and Kara out of the way, the marilith advanced on Topsy and Thecker. Mezzem used a spell that made her voice boom loud enough to heal and revive all of her fallen allies. Sajin, freshly healed, ran away from the marilith.

       I stood up and slashed at the snake woman with Dawnbringer, Kara rose and joined me in the attack- the marilith was looking bad. Thecker landed a perfect shot on the marilith and she collapsed, death. As it died, Thecker heard in her head that the marilith would be back for her someday. The other marilith vanished as soon as her comrade was down. At least we had killed one of them. I claimed her rattle, I thought it would be an interesting trophy to bring home.

       We realized that the twins had turned all of us, except Kara, into wererats, and confronted them about it. Topsy said that there might be things in Blingdenstone that she would need our loyalty on, and this was her way of ensuring she'd get it. I would have helped her regardless because she is my friend, but I suppose it doesn't matter now. Perhaps I can go to a temple when I get back home to get this removed. Mezzem seemed to take this the hardest, and she went off on Turvy. Apparently she saw it as a major betrayal to their relationship.

       Kara decided she wanted to be a wererat, and asked Topsy to bite her. I suppose we'll find out soon if it worked.

       Once we were done arguing, we resumed our travels, and after a couple of hours we came upon some ruins- the outskirts of old Blingdenstone. We found a fairly sturdy building to camp in for the night.

       That night, as my watch ended, I felt lightheaded again, and something pressed on my mind- I resisted it. Topsy and Turvy had tried to dominate the party, to keep them from going feral, but were unsuccessful with Claire, Kara, and Mezzem. The feral kobold went straight for her lizard, and Kara went for poor Rumpadump. I was so hungry and there was a delicious looking lizard in front of me, I had to eat it. Topsy failed her second attempt to dominate Kara. Thecker and Sajin had kept their heads, and jumped in to help. Thecker shot Kara, and Sajin jumped in to help, while I continued to advance upon the tasty lizard in front of me.

       Turvy failed his next try at dominating Mezzem, it seems she's more strong willed than he. Kara knocked Rumpadump unconscious, and the sprout began dying. I wailed on the lizard in front of me, when suddenly I felt something press against my mind, and it cleared; I realized I was attacking poor Clover- my lizard. The boom of Thecker's gun went off, and I saw her shooting Kara, who was standing menacingly over Rumpadump. Sajin smacked her and the half-valkyrie went down. Turvy, desperate to stop Mezzem, managed to bring her to her senses with a kiss. Thecker bent over Rumpadump and revived the poor lad.

***** Eleasias 16

       We decided it would be best to stay here for the final night of the full moon, so that we could easily contain ourselves. We found a mostly intact building, and put together a secure corral for the lizards and myconids, in hopes that putting them in a secure building would protect them from us if we went feral again tonight.

       As my watch ended, I felt the now familiar sensation of going light headed, right before my bones shifted. I kept my head though this time. Claire was the only one who didn't go feral upon shifting that night. 

       Thecker, Sajin, Mezzem, and Kara all bolted out of the hut we were in, going straight for the one we'd put the innocents in. Shit. Kara went straight for Clover, and Thecker attacked Mezzem's lizard. I caught up to Sajin, and managed to knock his ass out, I continued on to the hut. Claire had managed to hurt Sajin enough, even though she hadn't been attempting lethal damage, that the Angel of Death appeared before him. He lost the fight with it and began dying. 

       Turvy managed to dominate Mezzem much quicker this night, and Topsy brought Thecker to her senses right away. Kara, on the other hand, dealt a lethal blow to Clover. Mezzem headed toward the corral, and stopped when she realized Sajin wasn't breathing. All of the components she needed were locked in the corral. I tossed a couple vials of Kazul's acid on the door to the hut, dissolving the damned thing so I could gain entrance. Even in death my chérie was still helping me. I miss her so much.

       I saw Kara standing over Clover's unconscious body, and went straight for her, intent on knocking her out. Thecker came up behind Kara and grabbed on to her, holding her still so I could hit her better- it was odd watching the gnome hold on to the half-valkyrie that was twice her size. Mezzem came running in, grabbed something, stabilized Clover, and bolted back out of the hut. Kara wrenched herself free of Thecker's grasp, but I struck her again before she could do anything more; Thecker began punching her until she fell unconscious.

       Mezzem revived Sajin just in time, had she been a couple of seconds later he would have bled out. 

Photo from Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast

*Author's note: Many of the events, locations and characters that occur in this story are from the Out of the Abyss Adventure Module by Wizards of the Coast.